Thursday, June 19, 2008

The Treatise on Bathing Suits (ahem)

The Rambler is home again, all rambled out for the time being...

Car went like a thing possessed, and mileage was unbelievable even at high highway speeds AND at the more rally-like conditions of mountain driving. Some of those roads came awfully close to turning into Moebius strips, I am sure.

And now, anent bathing suits. (No doubt there is some kind of linguistic isobar dividing those of us who say "bathing suit" from those who say "swimsuit" -- but that's a thought for another day.)

YES, sistren, we ARE permitted to have two bathing suits. We after all have two brassieres (each), right? And at least two pairs of big-girl panties? Some of us, rumor hath it, even two pairs of SHOES. So why not two bathing suits?

BECAUSE, it is no more extravagant to have two than to have one; initial outlay is doubled, perhaps, but each suit lasts twice as long before getting all saggy and "picked" and ridiculous-looking.

My thought is not to wait for some longed-for improvement of physical figger before buying the two bathing suits, either. There ARE bathing suits out there for ladies in the Prime of Life...with nice discreet little skirts, some of them, too. ;-)

If the thought is still daunting, I recommend frequenting hotsprings and other such resorts in late spring but BEFORE schools let out for the summer. Not only is everything a lot less crowded before families take to the highways...but those clambering in and out of the pools carry their years with dignity and acceptance...and joy for the temporary sensation of weightlessness as well!!!

Sidelight on the whole question: one of the pools I visited had a "swimsuit extractor" -- a small powerful automatic spin-dryer, which greatly accelerated the drying of the bathing suit en route to the next pool. But apparently these machines are very expensive, and young'uns tend to swing on them and render them unserviceable, so they are not universally distributed.

Which gave me the GREAT THOUGHT of the week...to buy several gross of those handheld salad-spinners, and rent them out to swimmers to whirl their bathing suits in, by hand...Rich and Famous, I tell you, any minute now.

3 comments:

I'm Still Me said...

It's good to have you back! I'm glad that your holiday was wonderful. Good thing you weren't in this state or the kids would already be out of school!

Evelyn said...

I have to say that just the THOUGHT of putting myself through the torture of shopping for a SECOND bathing suit makes me CRINGE!

I do enjoy the current availability of "tankinis", which have a skirt AND comes in two relatively figure-flattering pieces. :~)

Evelyn said...

Oops! I did NOT check my grammar before posting that comment!